GEORGIANALEE: her life, her indulgences

2011-06-05T12:29:00.002+08:00

*peek-a-boo*
Been crazy busy with work, which my boyf has directly translate it to lazy. ): I have graduated & & *ahem* I am working now! I have grown up. ^^ Not funny, it isnt fun at all. ): Cherish school life boys & girls!

Gonna run for lunch now. (: Be back soon, I have tons to update! (:
Maybe I should find a blogger app on iPad. ^^ (:

xoxo~

2011-03-03T12:03:00.002+08:00

Picx taken during our staycation @infinity pool, MBS~

I love him for who he is, & for who I am when I am with him.
He turn my cant's into cans; & my dreams into plans.
He prioritize me ahead of everything else, he reminds me to smile when I forgot how to.

Thank you for your presence in my life; for being here all the while; for teaching me rights from wrongs; for making me laugh when I almost forgotten how to; for sacrificing all that little time that you have; for the warm chest & arms; for the bear hugs & passionate kisses; & for loving me with all of your heart.

HAPPY MONTHSARY~

2011-02-16T19:47:00.007+08:00

hello huns. (:
I am feeling better today. Still not the usual crazy jumpy and cheery me, but definitely better. Lesser crying at least; I no longer cry at workplace like some emo kid. More optimistic and looking forward to the end of day every single day. Half the confinement is down. Packing the remaining half with activities/plans (hopefully).

At least for tomorrow, I will be meeting my recruit consultant to get a job after I leave Citi (7 more work days, hell YAY!). & meeting Jeremy on friday over dinner. Timbre plans have been cancelled. which is good. I really prefer to stay at home waiting for boyf's call every night. Mum's so happy, she sees me at home by 8.45pm (latest) every night now! She mad loves my boyf. Keeps me home. HAH! Mum has been really awesome, staying up with me to wait for boyf's call. & asking many many concerned questions. BUT SOMETIMES SHE REALLY MAKES ME FEEL LIKE CRYING! ):

I cant wait. I cant wait. I cant wait for the weekend to come and go. I am spending saturday packing my boy's room & his (effing messy) wardrobe. When he's back, it will be SURPRISE! Please, dont let me get all too emotional there. Awkward much. (Probably may meet boyf's goddad for dinner after that!) :D THEN ANOTHER DAY DOWN!! *pray time passes like the speed of light* ^^

Now that I am living in this insane world all alone, boyf seems to be my only motivation and the only thing keeping me sane. From Sunday dinner to next wednesday night, I currently do not have any plans. Will be keeping a night for myself, for some alone time. Other than that, you guys can start arranging to meet me up for dinner. (:

Know that, I will blog again very very soon. [pinkie promise :/] Probably with a big event/happening the next time round. (: I will be uploading all outdated picx onto Facebook by these 2 days. Stay tune! ^^

P/S:
dear boyf, G prays that you are all fine on the stupid island which gets really hot in the day & really chilly at night. I am expecting to see a blackie. (Not a sick one thou') Your mummy will defnitely be making lots of herbal tea or whatsoever for you. I look forward to spend the 3days 3 nights with you when you book out. G is waiting, till then when I see you again. I am here 24/7. I miss you hub. Much love, G.

2011-02-10T21:33:00.002+08:00

this shall be a patronizing post.
haven't come into this space for a good one month.
after so long, I am finally home early. never been home before eleven for a long time. it has always been like, around midnight or later.
now, I will probably spend more time at home.

boyf enlisted into the tekong island today.
I am in an evil mood, feeling really depressed & moody.
been tearing a lot since the past few days, & my skin & eyes are in a mess.
feeling damn emo. will get past it in a few days hopefully.
really don't like the feeling of parting & separation.
but well, it's life. bad things always happen & good stuff seldom come about.

maybe I just needed some friends to be here now.
thank you every single one who bothered to whatapps me, call me, & sms me, including boyf's friends. G is thankful to have you guys around. Or I really dont know how I will be now.

Then, to my dearest boyf,

being alone on that stupid island isnt simple. in fact, it's really tough.
it hurts to part, & we both know that. but what else can we do?
today we hugged and bid goodbyes, till 2 weeks later.
deep inside you, I know you cant be less sad. I know you have your fears.
today we talked, & we got to even ration the handphone batteries.
today I wish upon the stars, that a genie will appear & I will make a wish, to stay beside you for the rest of my life.

we both know how getting through these tgt will make us stronger people.
we have our dreams. & only by finishing NS can we move on further.
we have to be strong & get it done; before we move on to embark on our studies tgt.
please take awesome care of yourself on that island.
know that, whenever you needed someone to talk to, & whenever you cant fall asleep in the middle of the night, you have me here with you. 24/7.

I love you.

Will definitely be updating soon. Read all formsprings just. Will reply by next week, when I recover from all the emo-ness & stuff.

2011-01-06T23:11:00.003+08:00

hello!
I NEED HELP! see, tomorrow I am going back for like my almost annual hair cut. Salon totally hates me, cut my hair like once (maximum twice) a year only! HAHAH! I really dont like cutting hair. ):

OK, that's totally not the main point. Thing is, I really can't decide to cut bangs or just trim my fringe a lil' & leave it with side parting like how it is now. HOW! ):

Can you all do me a favour please!

I have merged 2 pictures together, one taken when I have had my bangs, & another one that is taken just recently. (: HELP ME DECIDE OKAY, leave me a msg on formspring! (: :D tyvm. ^^

2011-01-02T00:41:00.002+08:00

P.S: Another post right below this! (:

Christmas Partyyy! (That's mine, how about yours!)

Last Christmas I gave you my heart.
But the very next day you gave it away.
This year, to save me from tears
I gave it to someone special.. (:

So this year, as the song goes, I celebrated it with my favourite boy, together with a whole group of heart-warming awesome people. (:

A few days before Christmas, Suat decided to throw a Christmas Potluck Partyy! Being the really PR type of people, she went ahead with all the plannings & we started sorting out the invitations & food list. (: Boyf sent invites to his clique, & many were so so spontaneous to attend the party despite being so last minute! (:

From left to right: Trav, Royston, Amelia, Dom, Yours Truly, boyf, ChengWai, Steven

From left to right: Suat, Pat, Daryl

Then, the food list. We have had ham, turkey, chicken, beef, fried rice, finger food ranging from nuggets to popcorn chickens & fishballs, fruits & most importantly log cakes, drinks & liquor! (: All of us were set to bring one of the mentioned food items, or there will be forfeit! HAHAHA! And true enough, all of them really brought the food item assigned to them. Awesome?

The food, eaten halfway. (:

Desert: Logcakes & hand-made muffins (I think it’s hand-made la! ) ^^

Party started at like 6? But there were quite a few of us that came down earlier to play mahjong & do the pre-party preparations. (: Dinner looks like buffet style somehow, & we would just take our food & slack around, chatting & catching up. Heart-warming isnt it? Like, isn't Christmas supposed to be a get-together with your loved ones and friends & spending quality time catching up with one another; instead of partying your Christmas away in a club? (:

Then, we screen movies & all. (: There was a table of mahjong addicts, & a table of poker addicts. From texas poker to in between to whatever card games & drinking games that you can think of, there were people losing money that night, & people getting drunk & all. (: Well, after all, it's the season of giving & the time to have fun! (:

And MORE PICTURES! (:

I am glad I spent my Christmas this way, & with dearest boyf. I have had fun & certainly hope that all those who attended the heart-warming get-together at boyf's crib have tons of fun too! (: MERRY CHIRSTMAS! (twelve days ain't over yet!)

PRESENTS FOR YOU!! ^^

Thank you boyf. (: & hope you like the christmas gift! (:

P.P.S: All blog posts would likely not be in chronological order! From August till now, there is like a good 10-20 events to blog about, & thousands of photos in my laptop. SO YAH, (: (: :D :D

2011-01-01T22:37:00.003+08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR! :D
Let us welcome this brand new year with big wide open arms! ^^ (:
HAHA! I have a good countdown over @Royston's crib, & a peaceful simple new year with boyf over at his crib. :D How's yours? Hope you have a great one too! (:

Then, as usual. It's like a thing to pen down new year resolutions, and probably half wont be fulfilled by end of 2011. But whatever lah, at least if I pen them down, I am making an effort to do it. So, there you go:

1. WORLD PEACE! ^^ -_-" your head la, I am not that noble/unrealistic. Rather, I just hope all the road bullies will stop bullying kind & nice drivers; & the ahbengs & ahlians around, grow up & stop going around slashing & killing. What kinda fcuking eras are y'all living in?! -_-"

2. Successful application into NUS/NTU/SMU! (: (albeit they dont exactly have the course I would want to major in.) ):

3. A good-paying temporary job before school starts to earn enough money to sustain life. -.-

4. A smooth-sailing & rewarding year for boyf & I. (: [where there would be minimal arguments, plenty of time & short getaways; where things are sweet yet simple) (:

5. A not-so-tough NS experience for favourite boy. I wish him well & all the very best in the next 2 years of army life. (:

6. Shed some weight. I am totally growing fat, eating with my boyf. I should start swimming & running. A lil’ difficult for the lazy me, but yah, I will try, You get it? ^^

7. Spending more time with loved ones. Mum, dad, boyf & brother. (: It’s funny, we always wont learn to cherish till bad things happen. I am not gonna let such stuff happen, then regret. I am going to learn how to cherish & treasure. Something which I never really know how to do.

For me, myself, & I, I only wish for academic success & little financial issues bothering me. Like out of debt! HAHAHA! (: I do not have to be rich, just sufficient to sustain my life & allow me to buy clothes every other day! (: HAHAHAH!

I wish for mum & dad to be healthy without any financial difficulties, & I wish for my only brother to do extremely well in his O levels.

HAPPY 2011!
I wish for you people to have a rewarding year ahead! (: (:

2010-12-19T13:13:00.004+08:00

Dear Santa,

I have been good this year. I didnt steal, nor rob. I may have not done tutorials, or skipped lessons. I may have hurt people's feelings, but I try to make it up as much as I can. I may have given threats to my group members, but it's for their good & an eventual A grade. I may have been playful & let mum worried, but you know, deep down inside, I love her.

Overall, I have been good & have not misbehaved. As such, an you grant me these for Christmas:

1. A new wallet from Burberry.
I know you must have read my mind & know that I want a Kate Spate one too! Well, I love Burberry as a brand better!

2. A good tote from Burberry as well.
I know I am insane over the brand, but I really really really love the tote bag I saw at town ytd! Ay, it's only a want on my list, not realistic as yet. Not achievable. Maybe you can grant me a good paying job & I will buy it on my own one day! (:

3. My davidoff perfume which has stopped production. Santa, maybe you can do magic??

4. Infinite candies & chocolate that is fat-free, so I can snack & won't grow fat! HAHAHAH!

5. Pay raise! HAHA!
Then, I can fulfil all the items I want on my own! Or, shorten my working hours. Or not having a need to work on Christmas eve & New Year eve! ):

6. A free or damn cheap getaway, to M'sia, or Phuket or BKK?
Of course, I would want to travel to the states, or europe. Or less ambitious places like hongkong. But internship isnt allowing me to do so. As such, I just want to go for a short getaway, please?

7. A happy boyf without who is unhappy-free & worry-free!

8. A boyf who doesnt sleep his day away & has his insomnia issues treated!

9. A happy us. :D
We are really happy now of course. (: I am greedy, I want a lil' more time & a lil' less arguments!

10. Most importantly, for my mum & dad to be always healthy & never ever have to worry about financial issues! For my brother to do well in his studies & life & be a lil' more sensible! For me to have an awesome happy family!

Thank you Santa. :D Merry Christmas! You have just lighted up the lives of many others! (:

With lots of gratefulness, & thanks & love,
G.

2010-12-19T12:40:00.007+08:00

I LOVE WEEKENDS!
AND I GO T.G.I.F EVERY FRIDAY!

boyf is returning to the sunny island today! *happy, elated, excited!!*
I will be meeting him after a good 5days! YAY! :D

saturday was really really well spent! (:

I saw zk after 2 weeks? & he seemed to put on weight. :/

hit town with zk, after returning to school to submit our PM report.
& holyshit, everywhere's on sale?!! I was totally estatic; & that was an understatement still!

SHOPPING SPREE after so fcuking long! damn happy. HAHAH!! :D

A new AX top, a pair of new AX slippers, 2 FCUK tops; boyf's Christmas present & a FCUK top for him; & one for my brother for doing so amazingly well in his N's! :D (: AWESOME!

cw came down to look for me at town after his work ended (for the FCUK tops!). & we headed back to tampines for dinner, before going back to my place to meet zeke & friends! mj session is <3.>

I am still goddamn excited until now! HAHAH! Has the urge to like, go back town & spam the labels! :/ (but cash at bank/cash at hand is not allowing. a/c receivables will only like come in w/ effect frm next week!)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My happy weekend is ending. ): tomorrow is monday again. suck.

Ever since internship starts, ohmygod, weekend is like mad precious to me la!
it's like, on friday, I will always be counting down to knock off!
then, the weekend, effing shitty short, just come & then, go off. ): ):
& so today is already sunday! ):

Every night, I totally return home damn tired & can totally fall asleep almost immediately. haha! in short, life kinda, suck now. okay, let intern pay & location be my MOTIVATION! okay, maybe not. Everyday I got to take this shuttle bus to Changi Business Park, & I need a staff pass, which I effing dont have! So, every morning, w/o fail, I got to see the evil bus uncle who will ALWAYS threaten me to let me not board the bus. I don't like! ): *frowns*

Life, it is like that. HAHA! I am so full of shit.
Now, I am counting down to Christmas! <3>
[ minus the fact, it got to fall on a SATURDAY! ): ]

update soon again~ :D

2010-11-29T22:59:00.003+08:00

I found a reason to like internship! :D
I can go shopping for working clothes; & by that, I mean versatile pieces which I can wear to work & hit the town with! YAY! <3 online shopping!
I am feeling goddamn excited & can't wait for PM to be over on wednesday! :D

Tomorrow I am gonna stock up on my coloured lens, & getting an office dress for day one of internship, & then getting my BBcream from Bio-Essense! :D

I frankly have no idea why I am feeling damn excited & stress-free now, with all the insane shoppings in my brain & the slightest content of PM. someone slap me in the face please! I have got a crazy idea to fail my PM & forward the module, & I have no idea why I got that thought. Opps! So, should I sleep tonight, or mug tonight & sleep tomorrow? *ponders, den shrugged at the thought of mugging* ):

P/S: Does anyone has any idea where I am able to alter my clothes, both length & PTP? The clothes I buy from livejournals are usually a little too long, or loose! ):

2010-11-28T16:30:00.005+08:00

First paper tomorrow, and I am already counting down for it to be over. (:

Its always at these kinda period,whereby you thought of the all kinds of stuff that you wanna do after exams. HAH~ But it wasnt as if after exams gonna be a big deal, BECAUSE THERE ISNT ANY UPCOMING HOLIDAYS! *screams*

Well, if you are thinking, "your life suck", I cant agree more.
I will be starting my internship @CitiBank next week; but to an extent, I am pretty much looking forward to it. I will be receiving an awesome intern pay of $950, where else can you find such good pay, considering it's internship & not those graduates intern. contented, I would say. (: I am hoping for a nice LO, & a nice supervisor, & of course course-related jobs, yet simple & good to handle. ^^ I am thinking too much. :D

After exams/Before Internship, my week is quite packed already! & I am really looking forward to it. (:

1st dec:
End of Portfolio Mangement Paper :D *jumps* ;
dinner with the clique.
our farewell dinner for dearest girlf, my companion for 3 years - Linda

2nd dec:
Hitting the town with part of my clique in the day & getting stuff done ;
& hitting the town again with waiwai & boyf in the evening. :D
p/s: hoping to walk around & snap the Christmas atmosphere. :D

3rd dec:
REBEL! :D

4th dec:
Advanced 20th birthday celebration with boyf.
p/s: Just the both of us. :D <3 style="font-style: italic;">5th dec:
Meeting the clique ;
sending our beloved girlf to the airport. ;
Advanced 20th birthday celebration with boyf & his family. (:

6th dec:
FML. Day 1: Internship.

Now, back to the books. *frowns*
Hopefully, the next time I am back, I will be done with my new blog layout. & more motivated to blog with the new look! (:

And (hopefully) den, without school, I will have the time to share:

taiwan trip (19th-26th sept)
yours truly birthday (27th sept)
club? birthday lunch? miscellanous? I see photos piling up, probably those random events?
farewell of our dear friend, she is returning back to Cambodia
boyf's 20th birthday <3

Give me a little more time though, meanwhile, keep tuning back to this space! :D

2010-11-14T12:15:00.008+08:00

boyf. PEN. (: that's my boyfriend.
I havent formally introduced him on this space yet, have I?

We are into our 4th month of the relationship. Excluding dating for about near 2 months. We first met while at work for PUMAevent. Then, on a dinner date & Marina Barrage. In between, some occassional textings. Found out a number of commons between us, & I totally love the level of comfort I feel around him. I can share with him everything, & he can see things from my perspective. He would die just to make me happy & watch me smile. He doesnt mind waiting for me, at my void deck, & I never really mind sitting by the bed watching him sleep. He would let me fall asleep on his shoulder while he drives me home from school or work. He is understanding, caring & most important, he love me for who I am. noisy, playful, cheerful, angry, irritated, frustrated, tired, hyper. (:

I love him. the silly faces. that personality. that him. that feeling so right, like never before.

he celebrated my 20th birthday with me, & now his is nearing. I am so goddamn glad I am gonna celebrate it with him! (: (P/S: I will do a proper post on my 20th birthday soon!)

so, boyf's twentith birthday is nearing. (: In 3 weeks' time! :D :D ~~And so are my exams.~~ Heh. I just receive invites over facebook for his 20th birthday dinner (by his goddad). Dinner will be held at Bistro du Vin, & a private room has been booked. :D details at: http://www.lesamis.com.sg/ (: *mad excited* pretty dress & heels. (: dress code states formal & elegant. :D :D

Boyfriend & I (:

Lei Garden Restaurant @CHIJMES

2010-11-14T11:45:00.004+08:00

Right at this very moment, I am supposed to be like, umm, doing my FYPreport. somehow somewhat, I should be opening word document & typing something. Problem is, I dont know what.

Into semester 2 of year3, into my final term, I seem to have slackened off pretty much. Rather, alot. This semester, or rather term, will not have a major impact on my grades, & probably would not affect my university's applications at all. Into my final term, with about 3 more weeks of school left, I could feel that tinge of melancholy & unwillingness in me, to go for my attachement &, then graduate. Okay, which person in the right state of mind doesnt want to graduate?! ME. And my defences are:

ONE. I prefer school to internship. I am not for the idea of waking up early from monday to friday & kncoking off in the evening. Internship has been confirmed to be at CITIbank.

TWO. I dont exactly know what I want to do after I graduate. 2choices: Move on to UNI, or work for two years before UNI. With a GPA lingering between 3.5 & 3.6, I really can't go anywhere much. I probably may qualify for many courses in the local universities already, but I can't qualify for the few tip-top courses which require a higher GPA of about 3.7. *frowns* I am planning to go Australia to further my studies with boyf, then again it's gonna be a little difficult to enter the same Australia univeristy. I shouldnt have been so playful in year 1. year 1 GPA stands at only 3.1. Enough said.

THREE. It's gonna be hard to kepe in contact with my friends when we are going to be splitting up so much. The boys are going to army; bestie probably going SIM. & darling girl returning to Camboda. And I dont really like the idea of making friends all over again. ):

2010-11-12T17:03:00.008+08:00

hello earthlings! (:
After a long long hiatus, I am back! (: (:
okay, probably most of you people abandoned reading this space already! ):

october was mad busy with poly forum & there was barely a week for me to rest, before school starts! SP, being goddamn "cool", decided to cramp a semester of work into a fcuking term. 2hours tutorials now turn 4hours. & 2hours lectures now turn 4hours too! ): FML.
on a positive note, FRIDAY is a school-free day. :D *grins at the thought of an uber long weekend* :D & to add on, I checked my NVP attendance, & it states 96.67%. woohoo! how the heck did my attendance went so high, I have effing no idea, & I dont really care either. I am only bothered with the fact that I can skip NVP for the entire of this term till presentation & still can pass my module! :D :D

Boyf & I have been good, awesome rather. :D :D
Blame him on me going missing on this space? ; for all my spare time are given to him!
Less of going on dates now, besides occasions. (: We spend more time snuggling & watching DVDs & muvees, and/or visiting the beach and sitting there talking about anything under the ~~sun~~ moon*!
Blissful, much? :D :D

Peektures! :D
On our 3rd monthsary @Missyou Cafe :D

umm my 20th birthday :D @Il Lido, Sentosa Golf Country Club. :D

Blissful, not? :D :D
Be back to edit my pictures! (: At boyf's place now! :D

2010-09-30T19:01:00.002+08:00

hello boys & girls!
I went missing for so so long! Opps!

Schedule has been mad packed! Even up till nowww!!
*feel like killing self* (p/s: NO TIME for boyf!)

Left for taiwan on the 19th! & returned on the like, 27th? :D
taiwan is a shopping paradise! <3 + taiwan meimei so goddamn cute!
I become a lil' more blonde after this trip, nonetheless, still damn smart. :P

Landed at like 0000? MY BIRTHDAY!
babyboy came down to airport to fetch me & carried the 1 luggage, 3 bags, countless plastic/paper bags I brought out of transit!
(machiam like ii buy the whole of taiwan! -_-")

back to babyboy's crib & stayed over, before heading back home! (:
received the bear hug I wanted + surprises! :D
makes me so happy! happiest birthday girl that night, on earth, promise! :D

sneak preview: http://27september2010.blogspot.com
everything's more or less there, minus muveee!
oh, best viewed in morzilla firefox. & dimensions done to suit boyf's desktop.
(in other words, will look pretty in boyf's desktop, but not necessarily yours!!) :P

BIRTHDAY = MC from poly forum. (:
(in case any tutors come across this blog, I really am sickk!!)

okay, I will do a proper post for taiwan trip & birthday (priority!) :D

this few days are spent in pre-polyforum activities & its goddamn boring.
besides the many fun & interesting new friends made, it suck.
I dozed off during every talk, dialogues & discussion (WITHOUT FAIL!)
damn hopeless, me. HAH!

Next tues, I will be departing for M'sia for polyforum (actual).
And honestly, I feel goddamn sad. ):
Not enough time to rest, not enough time for boyf, not enough time for myself (& complexion), not enough time to slack this holidays! FML.

ohmygod, I didnt know I typed so much.
nonetheless, glad you completed reading. BAH, boring thou'!

off for dinner now!~ be back soon again (if I have the time!)

2010-09-17T21:12:00.002+08:00

Peek-A-Boo! :D
Feels so nice to be back here, typing and all after going missing for so long!
books + studies + work + boyfriend have been taking up so so much time!

And now, END OF EXAMS! :D spells fun, excitement!
I finally have some time to myself at work now. some alone time. (:

TAIWAN's next! :D
I am leaving in less than 48hours time! mad excited; yet mad dont-want-to-leave!

okay, ii have a love-hate rs with this trip. -.-"
ii wanna fly fly, ii wanna get out of singapore. ii want to go shopping @tw!
ii dont wanna fly fly, because ii want to stay with PEN! :D
okay, forget it, ii sound damn desperate! ):

ii will try find time to do up another entry before flying off on sunday, 5am okay! (:
ii can try doing my USStrip with boyf, his bro &girlf. or 98.7 partyy @silk!
or just my lifeeee! (alot of pictures okay!)
my life aint getting boring at all. :D

till ii have got the time! :D

2010-09-04T22:38:00.003+08:00

Evil mood.

I am hungry.
I waited an entire day to dinner w/ someone close at heart, but eek.
I dont like waiting an entire day, for nothing.
I dont like that irritating feeling, damn disturbing.

I damn irritated that I cant pen down my irritations now.
Arghs. Okay, I should consider moving to lj. At least, I can private certain posts.

It wasnt choice-less, there was a choice.
The way you handled it, makes me damn upset over it.

2010-08-27T01:49:00.003+08:00

*updated another post below* :D

YAY!
I changed my blog song to my favourite song. :D :D

When you have to look away
When you don't have much to say
That's when I love you
I love you, just that way

To hear you stumble when you speak
Or see you walk with two left feet
That's when I love you
I love you, endlessly

And when your mad cause you lost a game
Forget I'm waiting in the rain
Baby i love you,
I love you anyway

Here's my promise made tonight
You can count "on" me for life
That's when i love you
When nothing you do can change my mind
The more I learn, The more I love
The more my heart cant get enough
That's when I love you, no matter what

So when you turn to hide your eyes
Cause the movie it made you cry
That's when I love you
I love you a little more each time

And when you cant quite match your clothes
Or when you laugh at your own jokes
That's when I love you
I love you, more than you'll know

And when you forget that we had a date
Or that look that you get when you show up late
Baby I love you, I love you anyway

Here's my promise made tonight
You can count "on" me for life
That's when i love you
When nothing you do can change my mind
The more I learn, The more I love
The more my heart cant get enough
That's when I love you,
When I love you no matter what

That's when I love you
When nothing baby
Nothing you do could change my mind
The more I learn, The more I love
The more my heart cant get enough
That's when I love you,
When I love you no matter what
No matter what

-That's When I Love You, Aslyn
:D

2010-08-24T22:40:00.005+08:00

it felt like it was fate that brought us together :D

Peek-A-Boo! :D :D
okay, ii am mad mad mad. 2am, & not asleep & here, finishing up a draft ii did a few nights back. –_-"
It’s friday, but dated tuesday! –_-“

I am supposed to be working on my fyp report. *frowns*

PEN & ii have quite a number of common friends.
And it felt like, if ii hadnt know him thru' one friend, ii will know him thru' another kinda thing. HAH! (okay, maybe ii am thinking too much!)

I spend an awesome weekend with PEN. (:
we spent last friday night bowling @KallangLeisurePark w/ his friends!
HAH. ii cant bowl for nuts, ~~& I got to take care of my nails!~~
Nonetheless, I have had fun. Probably its the people I am with. (:

*hello trav, boyf tilt at my side, not YOURS! see see? :D

from left to right:

steven, travun, dom, royston, boyf, yours truly, chengwai. :D

& ii <3 my boy! (: (: Opps!

& we spent a bit of time alone before liquoring too. :D
I am neither drunk nor wasted, & it felt good. (:

Back to fyp. ):
I will be back to update on saturday & sunday w/ PEN. :D
And let's hope I can attend 98.7 party this saturday!
(: (:

goodnights!

2010-08-18T20:20:00.002+08:00

ii finally accepted the 100+ friend requests ii have.

PEN will sit beside me, and delete them, next. -_-"

HAHA!

2010-08-17T01:28:00.000+08:00

says it all. (:
your smile - priceless. :D

p/s: be back after when I am awake. (:

2010-08-04T20:15:00.004+08:00

you make my heart flutter like a butterfly :D

that need to write, because ii wanna pen down this feeling.
& when ii read back on this post, ii will know exactly how it had felt.

it was a kind of excitement, damn, which is hard to pen down in words.
that kind of excitement to see someone close at heart.
with butterflies in the stomach. & that fluttering heart.

that smile that unknowningly form on the face, when the text message come in.
you smile silly-ly to the phone, like an idiot, & reading the messages another idiot has typed on the other end. those assurances & greetings that are received. & you just cant wait, but hit the "reply" button.

you cant wait for school/work to end, when you receive a call/text message.
it says, "I want to pick you up from school/work, so I can see you!"
& when you board the car, you can rest/sleep so easily, & not having to care about any other thing in the world.

you would make the effort to wake up early, despite that lack of sleep.
for you know, that one person has done it for you. because it's all worth it.
you would want to send him to work & pick him off work.
for you know, that one person has been doing it all these while.
because it was the best thing that can ever happen. that smile - priceless.

that fighting to pay for each other, without any financial constraints.
that decision-making when we dine.
& working for getaways. (& all & all) :D
& that smile curve up on the face again.

that insecurity, when that one person is around girls.
those little disagreements, because we care.
(by the way), this works both ways . HAH!

oh, ii think it's called bliss.
& den, my handphone just beeped again, & it says
"you always make me smile like some idiot :)"
so do you. (:

p/s: ii like creating emotions on my own, ii think. (:

2010-08-01T16:36:00.004+08:00

ii am going crazy soon.
ii am effing disturbed now.
ii so wanna scream out loud & strangle myself & die!!

ok. ii am upset. done.

2010-07-31T01:07:00.001+08:00

to you:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
I hope you are doing well now, happy & all. (:
all the very very best!

2010-07-30T23:47:00.002+08:00

Absence makes the heart grow fonder, or ponder & wander?

YAY! cleared equity analysis & fixed-income analysis report!
it's like one BIG BIG burden off my small small shoulder! :D :D
ii am left with FYP, before ii am off for my YOG breaks! :D

ii miss PEN so effing badly.

ii just turned down chunhow's offer to go watch movie. & now ii am bored. & maybe a little sleepy. & a little moody & all that shit. got to be the stock market. damn depressing. it keeps going against me. & depriving me of sleep. TSK!

ay, ii cant help, but the reservations & doubts (of myself & everything) are hell strong. a lot more ii wanna type. but ii should stop.

goodnights for now! :D
ii need to sleep soon!!

2010-07-26T04:11:00.004+08:00

Are you an alarm clock? You managed to wake up my sleeping heart.

I love playground fun. I love beach walks. I love talking our hearts out.
Oh, & I love this. HAH. An attempt to turn an upset girl to a happy one.

Awww..

Thou eeyore looks mad sad, but it’s so fluffy, ii am gonna dieee!!

*opps, blog song changed. a few days back. (:
and crystal jade buffet @holland village as supper with the clique later! :D :D
YAY!

2010-07-23T21:07:00.002+08:00

ii peek-a-BOO! :D
ii am back on this space, you people must have missed me so goddamn much!
ii just know!

ii am feeling so much better, because so many things happened!
inititally mad angry over the many silly stupid child-like acts of sore losers, & making many people around me went "WTF".

now, ii dont give a damn. cannot be bothered. ii promised!
people close at heart knows everything! HAH!
ii am so sorry, frugal living isnt in my blood, and money is not my life! (opps!)
no pun intended, neither am ii being spiteful. but rather, fact. (:

ay, ii am better better, good rather! (:
ii lovee the way my life is now!
good food. watching whatever movies ii want. random walks on the beach & by the jetty. suppers. awesome people. (& not having to use my concessions)!

peektures all in my comp already! :D
ii have got a lot of peektures of me & (of food)! ii will selectively post it up all sooner than soon! :D

next, it's supper with the girls! BE BACK AGAIN! :D

2010-07-20T20:10:00.002+08:00

I am dying sooooonn!!
ii fucking dont like that stream of gushing emotions ii swear.

ii am blaming it on that weird nightmare last night, which ii effing dont even remember. it has got to be something sad, (& by sad, ii equate it to a nightmare). ii woke up with tears rolling down my cheeks, & the entire day screwed and disturbed & depressing. FML.

all these emotions are like controlling my mind & heart and whatsoever now.
ii am so gonna dieeeee!!

save me!
buy me a tub/pint of chocolate flavoured ice-cream & many happy pills!

*you were clearly stronger than ii am. ii should have known it sooner. only to find out ii am the weaker one now, & to think ii shielded myself well enough. -.-"

2010-07-18T00:35:00.002+08:00

ii like getting wasted and not remembering a single shit that has happened. that was last night. Viebar with darling girl and guys, & getting super wasted, & only having recall vague images of what happened last night.

I was nursed.
tucked into bed. a glass of tea. panadol. water.
I woke up reeking of alcohol.
got home this morning, showered & hangover was mad bad.

Thank you for the companion last night; getting me drunk, and looking after me after that, and cleaning up the mess ii created, and sending us all home & looking after me all thru the night.

Thank you girl & boys.

*that temptation. ii hope you are doing well. you said you were strong.

2010-07-16T19:03:00.003+08:00

people say.
it's better to love & lost, than to never love at all.

people say.
now that ii have experienced the pain
of someone having let me go, & me letting someone go,
ii have grown a little more.

ii will be fine. that's probably the only thing ii can constantly tell myself now.

2010-07-16T18:45:00.002+08:00

arent feeling good now.

ii swear ii dont like that fucking aching feeling inside me now.
neither do ii like tears swelling & rolling down.
today, ii wish ii werent born.

it wasnt a right choice. but ii figured out, you will be better off w/o me.

2010-07-14T20:32:00.003+08:00

sad. depressed. upset. heartbreaking. lost.
ii am in a dilemma. which ii dont like.

that basically sum up all ii have to say.

2010-07-12T23:07:00.005+08:00

the only reason for this picture is, ii like my top, & (ii think) it looks good! :D

ii am not having the motivation to do fyp, nor any other reports.
this is bad. wednesday is (technical)trading paper, & ii know nuts about anything now.
ok, tomorrow better got to be a mug day.

ii am so tempted to club.
to get wasted and not think so much.
to put away all those troubles and those people lingering in the tiny brain space of mine.

to feel less vexed. to be somewhat happier.
liquor/alcohol does it well. :D :D

today ii collected money from sgpools for the FIRST time in my life!
feels so weird, yet satisfying! YAY!
end of compulsive gambling; saving up for taiwan next! :D :D

2010-07-09T20:45:00.005+08:00

ii am in a mean mood. ii need to sleep. ii am so having not enough of damn sleep this week & all. makes me whiny, & grumpy & exhausted. ): ):

ii slept for like, hmm, 5hours last night. for mfb report.
& hoping that ii will be able to like get plentiful of rest tonight!
which obviously wont come true, because god like to screw my life up.
suck.

ice-cream supper, which is damn sinful + fattening, with chunhow later.
ii havent seen my 10year friend for the longest time ever, when we used to talk on the phone almost everyday. we've been busy, or rather just me. studies & work & projs have taken my life away. ): ):

And before ii can even get sufficient sleep,
ii got to wake up for competition's briefing tomorrow, & instruction manual is like SEVENTY-FIVE freaking pages long; which ii doubt ii will even read. briefing is 6hours. -_-" from 9am to 3pm, at an effing faraway place @SIM. seriously, fuck my life.

And the only good thing to look forward to is meeting darling girl after that! :D :D
collecting pay & watching Eclipse & shopping spells fun & more fun! <3
ii am mad excited over watching Eclipse! :D

And den, the usuals are coming to my place to mahjong & watch the match between Germany & Uruguay. And ii am so gonna want Germany to win, please! $_$

then,
with zero sleep, ii am heading out at 7plus (in the fucking morning) to town for competition meeting. this suck, ii swear ii will be tired & grumpy & all.

ii am hoping to return home a little while to sleep. sleep. yes, sleep!!!
before heading out at 3 like that, to meet the fyp mates for CATScarnival & "fieldtrip" research. And whatever crap.

5pm: dinner over at my (weird) tutor's place, for a competition meeting with other competing groups. ii am not looking forward to this, ii prefer (very very very very much) to sleep.

the moment ii am home, ii am so gonna sleep, forever!
(and wake up to watch the FINALS!)

while ii like to be kept busy, this is way too much! BOO!
it started out from nothing, to fun, to school, to everything now.
life's such a bitch!

2010-07-08T03:00:00.002+08:00

hello space. :D
havent been in here for awhile, been mad busy w/ school (& life)!

& at this very moment, ii am watching semi-finals on channel5, & working on my maths report on my pink table, which ii got it from ikea today! mad loves it! :D :D

I dont exactly like what ii have been feeling now. lately. or whatsoever.
a mixture of that every little thing, including that little happiness. & other mix of emotions blending into it.

when my expectations drop to zero, ii expect nothing out of something.
ii have little disappointments. ii wont get mad. (probably happier.) :D

ps: germany & spain's match got to DRAW, (at least for the first half)!

2010-06-24T01:19:00.004+08:00

alright, ii cant sleep. not tired yet. LOL.
don's asking me to go to zouk, but ii am super broke.
so nope, stay home, watch my laptop screen feels cheaper. :D :D

tuesday was spent having lunch with clique, kinda a birthday lunch for cheese's twentieth. HANABI japanese restaurant for buffet lunch, which is mad expensive, of course, unless ~40bucks per person is considered cheap lah! (ps: if you are rich, just shutup ok!) :D we roamed suntec for super long & ii found out how damn bloody mad far the distance from millenia walk and cityhall mrt is. super FML. settled in starbucks for poker with crazy bunch of friends. LOL. :D :D

this is what we spam half the time. :D + many other good food, which the pictures didnt turn out nice. BOO!

babygirl & ii. :D

the birthday boy & the gift we got him & his free lunch. :D

the 5 of us. with linda back in cambodia. :D

And today, ii send my xperia into SE to repair & service & maintain. :D And SE gave me a courtesy phone to use. omg lah! you know, ii never knew got such services one la. ii thought ii will be phone-less. ok, whatever. so ii am using a lousy SE phone now, but ii think super nice to type on the keypad!! :D :D <3

lunch at DingTaiFeng with joey, before we make our way to goodwood park hotel to spam on durian pastries. fucking heavenly ii swear. if you havent been there once at all, die die must go ok! ii am going back there again, definitely. & of all things, ii got to leave my durianmisu & durian roll in office. ii hope it is still in the damn fridge when ii get to work tomorrow, please!

this is my lousy phone with good keypad. model unknown.

this is my durian snacks. (:

ok. cool. ii love this week. it's so packed.
thursday: should be empty. ii want to keep it empty. work at night & durian pastries for dinner. :D

friday: mad packed. ii got mahjong in the morning. joey will pick me in the evening for dinner @seletar. don is saying go down to rebel after his work ends at 11. woah woah! :D <3

saturday: morning & afternoon currently empty, just in case ii got drunk on friday night. meeting philip at night for dinner. :D

Should ii club on friday night? Or overnight mj? Or watch football & see my money fly away? ii like my busy life. keeps me occupied, ii got less time to think, it makes me happier in a way also. :D ii felt like ii have got a life, rather than doing the same thing over & over again. it makes me feel myself. & ii like it! it somehow aids recovery.

YAY! can sleep now. after ii decide which team to invest my money in, ii shall sleep & fly home watch soccer after work tmr again! =X

2010-06-24T00:18:00.002+08:00

Hello loves! (:
havent appeared on this space for awhile.
many of you people must have stopped coming this space right!
but anyway, ii must say ii am amazed by how people respond to my blog post so quickly.
and how ii always think no one reads it. HAHA!
funny me, whatever.

holidays is ending very very very soon. tomorrow is thursday.
friday, saturday, sunday & TADAH, it's term2. projects influx. BOO!

post exams was spent in linda's birthday party.
& spent getting drunk. ok, actually it really isnt that bad when so many people around you got drunk. ii quite like getting drunk and high actually, feels fun! aiya, it just isnt easy to pen down those feelings in words. just know it is fun ok! :D :D we completed 9 bottles at end of the day. achievement. gin made me drunk. LOL.

clique got for darling girl a polaroid & snap pictures of ourselves. :D
we got to see the long-time-no-see angel, who has become even prettier now!
the 05girls and the 08boys and the dba guys went as well! :D
boyf was there too. :D
pretty crowded, but looks like there is little people because the place is too huge.
birthday girl has an awesomely pretty & big birthday cake!

spam those pictures now! :D

this is me on the day. :D

boyf & ii. :D

the clique of us 4 back in yearONE. :D

current clique. :D

the 05girls.

the fun & the drunk. :D

& the birthday girl. :D

-end- all pictures are on facebook already. ii am feeling lazy to type already. waiting for 2am now, ii dont know for what actually. ii just lost football. FML. it’s supposed to finance my life. damn.

another post, or sleep? it’s 1.14am now.

PS: ii wanna watch toy story 3! everyone says its good!

2010-06-14T23:50:00.001+08:00

this picture sorta sum up all that ii am feeling now.
ii dont really like that sudden gush in emotions & memories.
it suck.

ii didnt like the nightmare ii have ytd.
ii didnt like seeing what ii have seen.
but ii know these are the things that keep me going.

heartaches, breakups, pain make people grow.
one day, ii will be fine all over again.

love & rs, is somewhat a scam. ii should stop believing in them.

on a side note,
HAPPY (belated) 21st BIRTHDAY TO
DARLING GIRL, LINDA!
&
HAPPY 20th BIRTHDAY TO CHEESE!

darling girl, thank you for being such an awesome girlf, always being here for the past 3 years! understanding me and knowing exactly how ii felt & everything! ii love you!

cheese, thank you for always being the clown among us, making us laugh with those useless epic fail pick-up lines; & for being such an awesome friend!

P/S: ii will reply to all tags tomorrow! (sorry derrick, yes, especially you lah!)

2010-06-12T00:42:00.001+08:00

from the very place they originated from;
thank you for the gifts.
in the box, ii found a GUESSbelt, a BEBE top, a COACHwristlet & a COACHsling bag.
:D :D :D

2010-06-06T01:09:00.001+08:00

something that ii cant live without now.
welcome to my life & being ard the past 2 or 3 weeks! (:

And PUMAevent today was tiring, but fun! :D :D
(damn damn)good pay. slack. face painting. 2 new friends. a PUMA top. starbucks. (:
if only the working hours have been longer.. .*imagine, den smile to self*

*picture shows my work attire! PUMAtop + shorts. (: (: comfortable + slack = FTW. (:
thank you royston & philip for job! :D :D

goodnights people! :D :D

2010-06-03T14:15:00.003+08:00

we have a long talk.

ii said,
there are some issues between us. maybe we shouldnt talk. the relationship hasn't been fair till date. it isnt fair to you, at all. we should give the relationship a second thought, maybe ii am never the girl you ever wanted right from the start.

you said,
you are damn sick of me thinking this way. that you never minded anything, as long as ii am happy. that ii am not trying hard enough, to try to make a change in my attitude towards you & the rs. that each & everytime ii say you are awesome & that we arent playing fair, yet ii am not doing things to make it right. you said you are trying so hard to make me happy, hoping that ii will treat myself better and the rs better. you said many times you wanted to walk out of the rs, but you love me too much to do that, and see me falling back into depression and all. that ii think breaking up is a wrong choice.

ii said,
you dont know you dont know you dont know! while you have so so much faith in me, ii have none in myself. it feels so tough to even try. ii dont even have the energy to try. you were right, ii lost myself in the process. ii am never the me again, anymore. emotions and feelings overwhelm me, that my heart never really have a real say; ii can barely felt its existence anymore. maybe you & your friends were right, you should give up on me. ii realised it was me being selfish all along, to drag you into my messy life, just so ii wont die so quickly.

fact is, ii still cant bring myself out of everything. ii brought all the habits from my selection of drinks to my selection of food & everything into present. ii sleep with mario every night. as much as all these are the past, ii didnt have the courage to walk out of it at all.

ii am sorry.

2010-05-31T22:48:00.002+08:00

FYPpresentation is over! :D
pending report is the only thing left!
thank you derrick, janelle, sarah & wangmeng for the awesome presentation.
and tolerating the perfectionism in me!

ii ate my awesome dinner at ease tonight, finally!
ii got to eat favorite ice-cream tonight & satisfy the ice-cream cravings after having seen the girls show me ben&jerry (which ii missed because ii skip school today!) earlier. :D

ii finally got the time to blog.
to look at the pictures taken at rebel last weekend. (:
long weekend was spend at rebel with babygirls [sarah & linda], kiara, donnie & eugene.

liquor binge & shots & getting high & hitting the dance floor.
minus that little bit of trouble, the night was mad awesome, until close & home! :D

tonight, ii finally have the time to search thru folders to look at all the pictures taken in may. hundreds of them :D

drinking session to bid farewell to dear ellis. she has left to seek greener pastures.
of course, all the very best to her. :D

our crazy random idea to vodka in school at wee hours & the crazy people. :D

ironman + LG + Starhub event [which ii dreaded totally] picture taken for fun, out of my usual playfulness! :D

cycling with boyf & bro [blood] some weeks back @ECP. :D

+ shopping, dining, chalet-ing & all. :D
ii have a fun-filled MAY!

tmr starts june & next week marks MSTweek!
life's been treating me good lately [except for irritating cashflows issues!]

ii am crying less frequent & smiling more often these days.
it may not mean ii am all fine & recovered, but at least ii know ii am on the right track.
on the other side of the world, ii see you are smiling so much more as well.

<3 people who has been here all these while! :D

2010-05-27T21:08:00.002+08:00

ii think ii got into a rs too soon.
trust; you didnt have that in me.

ii am bothered now. aiya. whatever.
off to REBEL now! (: (:
havent club for the longest time!! HAVOC next!

till after fyp presentation (probably, most probably) :D

2010-05-23T14:41:00.004+08:00

hello. ii want to blog, but ii have got no pictures. ):
ii am at work, ii am supposed to do my fyp report. ii have the main report in my thumbdrive, but of all things, ii FORGET to drag all the sub reports into my thumbdrive to compile & edit. FML.

ii am super LOL sometimes.
ii have a lot to type, and typing whatever that comes in my head now.
my brain is disorganised, so ii need to type.

today is week what?! *go count calendar now*
ok, tomorrow starts WEEK SIX. ok, need to think now.
monday - END-AT-SIX-DAY; steamboat with clique! :D
tuesday - work on report day. ):
wednesday - work on report day. ):
thursday - the LAST day of the week; REBELnight!; send report night.
friday - *reserved; taken; booked*
saturday - powerpoint day; SUPPERnight with clique. [no, not SUPPERclub!]
sunday - compile powerpoint day.
[ + whatever random plans along the way]

week six is so what the hell. because weel 7 is FYPpresentation week!
week seven is so what the hell because week 8 is MSTweek!
ii am feeling so messed up. *screams*

BUT ii have an awesome saturday last night.
will blog when pictures are w/ me.

everything ii eat is so sinful. liquor binge is making people fat. icecream. fried food. chocolates. ii will become sumo soon. ):

ok, great, you have just read a crappy random post. if you have completed reading this crap shit, you are crappy shitty as well. BUT I LOVE YOU!; just because you are just like me! :D :D

till whenever again, maybe tonight! (:

2010-05-20T23:13:00.003+08:00

this isnt the best thing to blogged about when ii havent come in here for 6days.
but, ii fucking need a job. an additional job. please!

ii am super short of cash now. ): ): ):
my financial management is damn screwed. & mum & dad really arent helping at all.

2010-05-14T23:58:00.002+08:00

ok, crap shit people. ii am turning ugly. no. cannot.
face got attacked by red spots. ok, half of my face to be exact.
it's neither pimple, nor acne, & it's itching.
aiya, in short, it's skin allergic, and of all places, MY FACE?!
ok, reminder: doctor next monday if still bad.

boyf. went pooling, as usual. on his friday nights.
throw me alone at home, because ii've got work tomorrow morning.

but this retarded asshole crap shit refuses to let me have some peace.
and left me with a joke before he went out. -.-"
makes me laughed, as usual. & it was all sweet! <3
thank you, boyf! :D

tomorrow's a long long day.
work + market research @ubi & bukitbatok +drinking session.
nice. 4 bottles now & (maybe) still counting. with 6 people.
goodluck people!

now, first, goodnights. (:

2010-05-13T00:04:00.005+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SARAH HO!
(yes yes yes, we are finally on PAR! we are both NINETEEN NOW!)

no 101 frolick badge. no angbao.
just this, & we hope you love it! (: WAIT, CAN YOU RECOGNIZE THE PAPERBAG? –.-"

it has been awesome to have you in my life in these 3 years. because:

when ii am upset, you got me going. you were there.
when ii broke up, you were there. a listening ear.
when ii am attached, you share my joy. you analyze the guy.
when ii am crazy, we go insane together.

we talk about anything & everything under the sun.
we share our deepest secrets. we go on dates together.
we copied tutorials. we skip lessons.
we go on shopping spree. we eye the same thing.
we splurge on good food.
we club together. we got high.
we think the same way.

AND
we did EVERY SINGLE project together & you totally tolerated my temper, my perfectionist behaviour, EVERYTHING!

babygirl, ii so totally love you!
three years of friendship & still counting till end of time!

2010-05-11T10:27:00.003+08:00

words that are harsh make goodbye easier.

fyp fyp fyp. study study study. play play play. work work work.
these 4 words basically sum up my life since school start.

busy!
off to class now, town-ing this evening + nails. :D
spells good life!

2010-05-10T23:16:00.004+08:00

he reminded me of us.

of how we started. our lives. & how we ended eventually.
they were pretty. there were more downs than ups.

and now, they are all memories.

2010-05-05T22:29:00.001+08:00

ii am damn traumatized now.
super traumatized.
spells shit.

2010-05-04T20:48:00.004+08:00

h.e.l.l.o! (: (:
it's tuesday today, 3 more days to FRIDAY!
ok, whatever. *ignore*

caught "THE LAST SONG" w/ boyf, sarah & zacson last night.
~~feel likes~~ feels like a second double date. lol.
anw, movie is MAD AWESOME!
it's like friendship + relationship + kinship & stuff.
super touching, girlf & ii came out teary, eyes like half swollen. -.-"
so ya, it's a (die die) MUST WATCH!
even the 2 guys admit it's fantastic!

NOTE:
**movie is yet to be released. showing on 13th may. must watch!
the one which ii have watched is a sneak preview;
in short, private screening lah! am glad ii went for the show.
<3 the show!

supper at kim gary hk cafe with boyf after that. (:
beef fried rice & fish filet baked cheese rice. (:

me. yours truly. georgiana. (: & that goddamn ugly pimple. BOO pimple! BOO!

boyf. looking at his food, but cannot eat. (because mine hasnt arrived) den act yi ge SAD. -.-
boyf, time for a hair cut! LOL.

den we started playing with camera & doodling.

off for ice-cream now! HAAGEN DAZS, here ii come! <3 [thank you boyf!]
& FYP. (derrick, see see see, ii also will do FYP work one ok, never play everyday!)

goodnights! :D :D

P/S: **special thanks & credits to zac, movie evangelist, incinemas.sg, for the free movie tickets to the private screening.

2010-05-02T13:30:00.003+08:00

ii know ii shouldnt be doing this. or rather ii shouldnt have done this.
ii am sorry. - 1.30pm.

2010-05-02T00:27:00.004+08:00

you didn't know how hurting your words are.
you broke a heart which you have used needles and thread to mend it back.

2010-05-01T09:10:00.002+08:00

having less than 4hours of sleep is so gonna kill me at work later.
home at +/-4am. slept at 4plus. woke up at 7plus. ~~FTW.~~ WTF.

ii can still feel alcohol in my mouth. bleahx.
OFF TO WORK NOW, at the atrium @plaza sing. (:

2010-04-28T23:27:00.004+08:00

And side note,
ii am glad the person, who-shall-not-be-named;
is well, happy, & more or less contented with his life now.
at least, finally everything going on the right track, & probably well now.

thou' it isnt easy & wont be easy, but ALL THE BEST!
:D :D

2010-04-28T22:59:00.003+08:00

ii will learn to cherish, treasure, this & that.

many more todays to come! <3 <3

dear boyf,
firstly, thank you for the pleasant surprise + gift. (:

ii am super grateful ii have you in my life for the past 4-5months (or more).
& you only got even more special when we became official.

for all these while,
thank you for always being so ever patient & always giving in to me.
thank you for understanding me, & looking after me despite this & that.
thank you for respecting my space, yet trusting & loving me the whole time.
& of course, accompanying me to do silly stuff, & walking me there & that, & waiting for me to end class most of the time (since ii definitely end later than you!) :D

(& of all days, you got to fall SICK today! EVIL!)
boyf waited for me all day in school. waited for me to end lesson. waited for me to end my FYPproj w/ my group's client. waited for me to finish my selection interview; when he is so bloody sick. SORRY!

patient's food for dinner = healthy; but hungry (now).
get well soon, boyf! <3 <3

ohyes, same goes for me. ii <3 you too. :D

2010-04-24T00:28:00.004+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY
(sarah's boyf) ZACSON; &
FYPmate + GOODfriend + BRO, DERRICK!!
:D :D :D

(such such a coincidence, ii didnt even know both of them have the same b'day! And if ii wish only anyone of them on my blog, later another jealous. -_-" [eg. ii wish derrick on my blog, & not zacson, later sarahbaby complains.] so yes, there you both go!!) :D :D

2010-04-21T21:02:00.002+08:00

fuck you. period.
you arrived on a wrong day.

of all days, ii got to oversleep today. no. ii shouldnt even oversleep.
and of all days, you got to screw me on the day my boyf doesnt gives me wake up call.

you screw my mood up.
you make me mad out of random, you make me emo.
you screw my diet up.
you make me eat instant & still feel hungry. ARGH.

you gave me one weird tutor today, who says ii am under-performing.
which totally demoralise me.
ii really shouldnt be a scholar. even good grades become bad, for so long it isnt 3.9. fuck.

you gave me cramps.

boyf isnt buying me (warm) soya bean.
And for whatever reason, ii am feeling down & tired & all.

now,
my only consolation is that, dad's picking me off work.
& mum was talking to me about granting me COMPLETE freedom. (:
& giving me an ipod touch! WOO! :D :D

having an 8-5 day tmr really isnt motivating.
And for boyf, 10am-10pm lesson. goodluck (like it helps)! -_-"
ii will wait for you at home ok (unless ii am going out)! (: (:

And,
it's holy crapp that ii am left with 20bucks till payday.
ii spend 50-70% of all my money on cab. cabbing becomes habit again. fuck.
ii dont know how ii spend my money, really.
ii havent been eating a lot, but my money is depleting like mad.

kind souls, please? POSB SAVINGS 209-23979-5. :D :D
LOL.

am feeling better now! :D
till work end & home & goodnights! :D

2010-04-20T00:34:00.003+08:00

12.38am.
HOLIDAYS ARE OVER FOR A DAY NOW. BOO!

but this holidays, is probably one of the most awesome holidays ever.
mad meaningful. slack. free. relaxing. expensive. fattening. sinful. lovely. sugary.
fabulous. fantastic. and all the good words. (:

10 events to sum up my 6 (or 7) weeks holidays: :D :D

1. ii went to cambodia over a period of 2 weeks for OCIP.
mad meaningful! it was beyond words could describe, you really just got to experience it yourself! no blog entry on this cos’ ii honestly dont have much idea how to go about writing it. reflections are done at www.operationcambodiagr4.blogspot.com, you can search for my entry there (below reynard’s & dan’s). :D
learnt a lot. changed certain perspectives of mine. changed me; & my life.
loves the simplicity of life, & the kids! *misses*
loves seeing more smiling people, loves the companion, loves the people who went on the trip.

2. ii got into a relationship, after all the downs & downs.
w/ a guy who is mad patient, tolerant, smart, talented, caring, understanding, loving; he surprises me, he plans everything out for me, he keeps me organized. (:
& a guy who loves me with all of his heart. & healed the broken me.

3. ii embarked on a double date w/ sarah & boyf.
caught "HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON" in 3D together.
dinner. & pool.
sarah & ii gossiped & catch up; while we watch our boyfs play pool.
pretty awesome. (:

4. ii ate all the good food around. & steamboat-ed too too much.
boyf & ii only dine at foodcourt ONCE, maybe twice; or thrice.
sundays are always spent dining w/ boyf & his friends. (:
fattening + expensive.

5. ii attended my company's 10th anniversary dinner @Clarke Quay.
which also marks my first year as a p/timer in the company.
dine @Peony Jade Restaurant & ii swear it serves high quality food. (:
PartyWorld + (mad) drinking session.

6. ii met up with JER BRO over dinner one fine evening.
and we caught a movie together. was all nice scrolling home & catching up agian. (:

7. ii met up with gwee & sabrina, the pitch! :D :D
lunch @BreeksCafe & Kbox. (:

been so goddamn bloody long since ii last saw both of them.
nothing changes; but both of them become prettier, as usual.
we still have endless things to talk about. we are still the us we know. (:

8. ii met up with net & hiang over dinner @Sakae.
ii always thought my break-up would end the friendship & all.
but well, ya you know. (:

we exchanged gossips, caught up, ate & chill.
it felt heart-warming & stuff. they are all doing well & ii am glad for them.
gaotong will be out soon as well. good for choonhiang.
we talked about getting married, & ii was saying ii wanna their sister! :D

9. ii cut + dyed + treatment my hair.
back to bangs, & now, the colour of the hair is a tone lighter. (PS: I DIDNT PERMED LAH!)
still the ahlian look, but am not an ahlian. :D

10. ii met up with my favourite people @SPSP. :D :D
owen, yihao, jiahui + boyf; over dinner.

owen, became quieter, listening & lauging more now. :D
maybe his girlf has somewhat tame-ed him. :D

yihao, still that bird face + bully. :D
still as smart. always attempting to start "quality" conversations.

jiahui. still the dragonboat boy. but more ahbeng now.
got himself attached. :D

it was all nice seeing them again. see how much we have changed; how we all got attached; & how blissfully happy we are with life now; & watch how yihao whine about still not having a girlf yet.

the few main events basically sum up my entire vacation.
ii spent most of my time with boyf & his friends. mj-ing. movie-ing. etc.
ii like the feeling of knowing everyone is well & fine. ii like seeing how most of us are contented with our lives now. :D :D

goodnights all. bed now.
boyf will wake me up tmr.
4pm lesson, but off to school early to meet boyf for lunch. :D
maybe gonna dinner @newton with boyf & his bigbigbig clique of friends. :D

P/S: ii am sorry ii look hideous & crappy in some of the pictures. =X

2010-04-17T00:29:00.002+08:00

ii wonder what's wrong with the both of us today.
you asked me if you are the guy ii want, & have ii found the right guy.
you asked me if ii am very happy w/ you.
you said, answer you really seriously & honestly.
because ii think each & everytime ii just joked about it.

now ii say.
ii asked myself once, twice, thrice. & ii dont know if you are the right guy, or the guy ii want.

ii came into this relationship knowing that both of us would have an awesome future together; knowing that ii found the guy who would do almost everything with me; & wouldn't argue with me; who would compromise & give in.

ii met someone who brings an umbrella to my workplace because it is raining.
ii met someone who brought me breakfast, when ii said ii was hungry at 3.30am.
ii met someone who never fails to make me wait.
ii met someone who will so definitely send me home each & everytime.

whether ii am very happy or not,
ii admit ii still do get upset & all over you-know-what, sometimes, maybe most of the times. ii argue with you when ii am in a bad mood, ii cry & every little piece of shit.

but most of the times, ii really am so so so goddamn bloody contented.
because ii have you, who always try to make me smile & laugh over the silliest thing possible.

baby, then what's more can ii ask for now?
but to say, thank you & ii <3 you.

2010-04-16T02:49:00.001+08:00

that urge. that temptation.
ii am resisting it all.

but fact still remains a fact.
it doesnt change.

2010-04-16T01:19:00.003+08:00

today is a happy day. :D BECAUSE:
1. ii did my nails! (MAINCURE + PEDICURE)
2. ii head down to twister@ TampONE & kason got me a pretty haircut! :D
3. ii PERMED my hair too. :D :D
4. boyf came down to pasirris to pick me home (& went home, instead of drinking). :D

**but complexion looks real screwed & crappy (refer to pictures below). need facial sooooonnnnn. PLEASE MUM? :D

tomorrow is a happy day too (ii think) :D BECAUSE:
1. ii am getting my hair dyed + treatment! :D
2. boyf will come find me in the afternoon after ii am done w/ hair. :D
3. meeting yihao, owen, poh over steamboat! BEEF GALORE!
(of course, boyf will join us for dinner as well)

MY NEW HAIRCUT + PERMED HAIR. :D :D

goodnights people.
gonna game now, den sleep. :D

*today refers to yesterday. tomorrow refers to today.
because it's fucking 1.30am now. -_-"

2010-04-13T23:43:00.004+08:00

hello! am in a gooooodd mooodd today. (:
met up with best friends sabrina & gweeee over lunch & kbox. (:
another post!

got pissed w/ boyf earlier on, bcos ii thought he prioritized mahjong over girlf!
lately, ii think ii got stalked, & this fellow is scarin'/freakin' the hell out of me.
plus, it was raining super heavily. my slippers are slippery.
boyf knows, still tell me he cant finish mj, & ask me go home myself. -_-"
what the hell.

BUT BUT, is he purposely one lo! act dont care.
when ii exited office, he is waiting downstairs for me with an umbrella! (: (:
tried acting mad at him, but failed. LOL.
how sweet can this silly boy gets? <3

& more pictures from yesterday's meet-up. :D :D

extracted from net :D :D

the happy & eating people :D :D

our bigbig diet. :D:D

under-table scandal. :D
dat’s us. hiang. net & me. :D :D

till tomorrow! (:

2010-04-13T02:01:00.003+08:00

met up with net & choon hiang at causeway point just now. (:
dinner @Sakae(buffet) + chit-chatting + chilling out was AWESOME. (:
havent seen them for a reallyreallyreally long time.

we talk about you, me, her, him, us. everything.
we updated each other about our lives & gossips.
we guess who among us will be married first.

& they made me realize one thing.
it wasnt as easy as ii thought it can be.
because it was the many things we once shared.

another sleepless night. another nightmary night. another moody night.
erase me off from those memories, remove that little box.
only den, ii will feel better. suck.
ii am doubting my own ability, not at all yours.

2010-04-10T00:09:00.006+08:00

when you assured me all would be fine;
when you assured me that, me being happy was all that matter;
when ii fall asleep holding your hands, & waking up having nightmares;
when ii got upset & all, you said nothing but gave me a hug;
when you lead my life with me & share my dreams,

ii know you are making a difference to my life, & me.
<3

ii am sorry, ii still disappoint you so so much.
you knew how ii felt, you knew when ii got upset. you could read my mind.
most of the time, you know, but kept it to yourself.
sometimes, ii really hope you wont read my mind so much.

2010-04-09T01:31:00.008+08:00

evil mood.
ii probably know the reason why. not revealing here.
did ii make a right choice?

maybe its just me. ii think it lies with me.
evil mood really isnt good. ii dont like that upsetting feeling.
it's just today. ii will wake up feeling normal, fine & happy tomorrow again. (:

goodnights people. :D
~~ii wonder the you on the other side, how are you doing today?~~
ii wonder if you have been fine. ii hope you have been happy.
sorry boyf.

2010-04-04T12:15:00.004+08:00

am at work now.
& beside me, there's a cert, a cheque & 60dollars voucher. :D
this is the reason why ii love my job, & the company.
great perks, awesome environment & ii get to do whatever ii want. :D

ii am back in s'pore for 2weeekss plus now. & ii miss cambodia, still.
blog about it tonight; ii am gonna pick 12 pictures for the 12 days. :D
near 800 pictures now, really arent easy to pick TWELVE.

this week, ii:
went on a double date with sarah & boyf, boyf & ii. :D
attended company's 10th anniversary dinner (also mark my one year in the c/o). :D
chilled over at jianwei's place with boyf, darryl, ray & kooon. :D
mahjong-ed over at harry's place with boyf & kel. :D
[p/s: boyf, will you stop winning my money, please? (: (:]

next week & the week after next, ii NEED to:
cut & dye hair. yes, dye & cut. twister twister twister. love my salon + stylist! (:
manicure + pedicure. getting my nails done. (: (:
facial. needs to book an appt, & boyf must be busy. (:

mooney mooney. crapp, what's with having not enough money?!
ii wanna go get a new bagg. (:
ii want to buy ipod touch. ROARS.
ii need get my facial foam, makeup remover, DIY masks.

school reopening in 2weeks!
another semester to build on my academic portfolio + GPA.
& before ii know it, its gonna be university application. badd.
SMU? NTU? NUS? ACCA? OVERSEAS?

noway noway, ii dont wanna go SIM, MDIS etc etc, please?
ok, actually, ii wont. maybe SIM. but NOT MDIS.

boyf just told me he released a lobster that is as heavy as me into the sea. -.-
boyf, quickly quickly return to landd.
boyf, we can jog from your house to yishun dam.

boyf is picking me off work later!
simlim square to hunt for my earpiece first + check out ipod touch + find koon! :D
den dinner. :D

P/S: ii want breakfast tmr. (:
& holy, what a random post. till next. (:

P/P/S: wishlist updated. :D

2010-04-01T12:57:00.001+08:00

loves the breakfast boyf got for me this morning. :D
And now, boyf is reminding me to eat medicine again. BOO!

2010-03-30T01:06:00.004+08:00

28.03.2010.
we got together, after hmm. 4 months?
so many people like the changed r/s status! *happy*
a r/s looked forward by many of our friends. (:
& ohyes, thank you for all the blessings given!
because of all these blessings, we will last long! (:

& yes, ii am silly boy's FIRST girlf. (: (: (: *damn happy*

sidetrack:
ok, actually ii just found out this silly boy has a crush on me since, last july?
the time when owen, jiahui, boyf & ii work on our TWT II discussion together. (:

the four months, love story, another post, maybe (: (:
but yes, all in all, in the past 4 months, he has proven me right that ii will be good in his hands. (:

for the past 4 months,
he look after the very vulnerable me day & night, night & day.
he took away all those unhappiness in me, transformed & changed me into a happier person.

when ii cried so badly, he gave me the assurances that everything will be fine. (:
when ii needed someone so badly, he will always be here. (:
when he knows ii can't be left alone, he came over to my place in the morning, just so when ii am awake, he will be around. (:
when ii got wipe off by the damn medicine & fall sick, he was there doing nothing but watch me fall asleep. (:
when ii wanna watch a drama/movie, he always have it streamed & prepared. (:
when ii make him watch chick flicks w/ me, he never complains. (:
when ii tell him of my cravings, ii always get to eat what ii want. (:
when ii said ii wanted haagen dasz after ii land back in singapore, he bought it & brought to my place. (:
when ii always forget to switch off the switches, he will do it for me. (:
when ii complain of how slow my laptop is getting, he gets the problem all solved for me. (:

when ii felt bad after exams, he always tell me ii will get GPA 4.0. (:
when ii am cold, he never fails not to give me his jacket. (:

for the four months, ii am glad, really glad ii have him in my life.
he gave me a steady hand, he shared my dreams.
ii fall alseep, & wake up, knowing my heart is safe.
thank baby. (:

side side track:
dinner with boyf after work last last night. (:

ii love my hair so so much, just like how ii love boyf! :D

boyf wrote that for me, before we got together. (:
yes, boyf learns jap. (:

boyf,
-.... .- -. -.- -.-- --- ..- ..-. --- .-. -... . .. -. --. .. -. -- -.-- .-.. .. ..-. .
.. .-.. --- ...- . -.-- --- ..-, .... .- -. .-.. . -.--!

P/S: blog song updated – Today Was A Fairytale, Taylor Swift. (:

2010-03-26T21:39:00.002+08:00

a happy boy & a happy girl.
an ordinary person who light up the world of distressed damsel.
an extraordinarily smart person pursuing the same dreams as that of a not-so-smart.
a multi-talented person liking someone who knows almost nothing.
a gamer looking after the sick & worn-out.
a boy sitting in front of the piano playing a song, a girl next to him.
a freshie attempting to hold the hands of a girl.

the one ii woke up seeing everyday, & ended my calls last with everyday.
<3

2010-03-25T19:12:00.002+08:00

hello earthlings!
all tags replied. some quite deep deep down, so you've got to hunt for it. (:

it has been a week since ii am back in singapore!
ii will be doing my YEP reflections tonight, so expect a post soon on my cambodia trip!
lots of photos. lots of words. lots of reflections.
think it's gonna be a long long post. HAH! (:

~~schooling tmr.~~ no. to submit my YEP forms.
next week got post expedition activity (ii think). daniel isnt updating me!
and after which, ii am probably done with entire of year 2. (: (:

results suck. but somewhat expected.
nvm, GPA still goes up. (:

ITboy totally scammed me. he promise me the maximum attainable GPA is 3.99.
but he gets 4.0. what the hell. hate you. BOO! -_-"

he spent six hours (or less) studying a module.
ii spent 10 hours (or more) studying a module.
he still do better than me! *screams*

but whatever, my defence is:
BUSINESS COURSE IS SO MUCH HARDER!!

ok, random post.
till the next post, ii hope it's on the trip. but no promise! (:

2010-03-25T00:06:00.004+08:00

blog song changed.

chinese really isnt my forte.
LOL.

ii think this song depict a lot about me, you, us, everything.
reason for this song is also because it has quite a bit of significance to me.

was this the song that we first came across when we watch one of our first dramas?
was it 转角遇到爱?
it has been three years. honestly, ii cant exactly remember.

好眼泪坏眼泪- 徐若瑄

我曾认真试爱着一个人
他给我幸福的可能
我等我问未来何时发生
他只是给我一个吻

快乐我哭是因为你的手
曾答应带我向前走
难过我哭是因为我的手
找不到你说的以后

好眼泪坏眼泪我都曾为你流
感动和悲伤都是理由
只不过在你不再爱我了以后
像坏的眼泪慢慢流

快乐我哭是因为我付出
得到你温柔的答覆
难过我哭是因为我认输
你的心永远留不住

好眼泪坏眼泪我都曾为你流
感动和悲伤都是理由
只希望在我不再想你了之后
有好的眼泪慢慢流

好眼泪坏眼泪我都曾为你流
感动和悲伤都是理由
只希望在我不再想你了之后
有好的眼泪慢慢流
有好的笑容陪着我
. . .

for the very last time, all the best.

ii promise. because ii dont want to hurt you any further.
ii totally know it doesnt feel good each & every time you watch me cry.
stop saying "as long as ii am happy, that's all it matters."
it has been four months. four months. four months.

for the past week,
ii really like the idea of waking up & the first person ii see is you.
ii really like doing nothing but watching drama & gaming.

ii promise this will be the last.

2010-03-24T01:14:00.004+08:00

如果还有遗憾
又怎么样呢
伤了痛了懂了就能好了吗

曾为他相信明天就是未来
情节有多坏都不肯醒来

我的心深深伤过却不会忘
逃不开爱越深越互相伤害
越深的依赖越多的空白

我和他不再属于这个地方
最初的天堂最终的荒唐

若那一刻重来我不哭
让他知道我可以很好

-丁当 - 我爱他

2010-03-24T00:47:00.001+08:00

ii totally miss this mad awesome place.
the place you learn about the simplicity of life & how to appreciate life better.

ii miss the kids.
ii miss the french loaf.
ii miss the chilling-out sessions back in the dorms.
ii miss the people who went together as a team.
ii miss everything back there.
*screams*

opps. yes, ii have absolutely zero make-up on.
ii hope ii dont scare the hell out of you people, for there's more coming!
(:

2010-03-23T23:55:00.005+08:00

RESULTS ARE OUT LATER!
ii am so screwed.
ii have a feeling no more 3.8 this semester, which is badd. ): ):

this semester;
too many things have happened, & ii am way too distracted.
significant people have joined & left, leaving me w/ an impact so huge that it feels so difficult to digest & absorb.

so conclusion: no 3.8 for GPA; bad grades
~~(equivalent to ii am screwed; or rather ii face the threat of being out of scholar programme)~~
): ):

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
whatever that ii am doing now.
benefits me, you, him, her. everyone.
probably the only way & the only choice, such that all of us can move on with the next phase of our lives.

my eyes are so sore now.
ii havent been sleeping well at all. nightmares really aren't funny.
ii woke up feeling scared & crying, & it's taking away ALL my sleep. ):

spending the entire night out yesterday was great.
ii didnt have to try to tire myself out.
and coming home this morning, ii could fall asleep so easily. (:
but 4hours of sleep everyday isnt doing me any good!
cant sleep for long thou', ii will have nightmares! ): ):

~
it felt like you are the knight in shining armor, rescuing the damsel in distress. (:

2010-03-22T21:17:00.002+08:00

today is the 22nd.
the number still remains that significant.

been wearing specs out everyday.
been going out with super light make-up everyday.
havent been feeling good. been feeling horrible.

tempted to shut down this space.
tempted to close my facebook.
tempted to change away my msn.
tempted to change my handphone number.
tempted to change my house number.
tempted to get out of this country.

tempted to run, run & keep running.
if only, all these can aid those heartaches, ii would have gladly allow myself to escape & hide & never come out again.

2010-03-21T17:26:00.003+08:00

OHYES, BY THE WAY, (minus all those angsty-ness & stuff),
I AM BACK FROM CAMBODIA.
but am missing the place really badly.
ii know this might sound insane, but ii am thinking of going there to help after ii graduate. ii have fallen in love w/ the simplicity of life there! mad awesome!
a proper post on this will be up soon. & photos will be up on facebook tonight.

And 9 running conversations.
all trying to cheer me up. thank you! (:

was talking to zeke.
den ii realised, 3 years of r/s, & ii lost my own identity.
dat explains why ii cant be myself again when people ask me to.
because exactly, who am ii?

2010-03-21T12:36:00.004+08:00

maybe if you didnt teach me how to love, ii wouldnt be feeling so upset today.

but,
maybe if you didnt teach me how to love, ii will never know what it is like to love.

有人说:
爱一个人多久, 就需要多久把他给忘掉..

2010-03-21T11:51:00.004+08:00

ii feel tired. ii feel upset. ii feel horrible.
spare me a happy pill, if even it helps. ;OR
spare me a sleeping pill, & ii never have to face this harsh reality again.

ii am honestly too tired. ii dont know how to carry on from here.

but if people around me are happier this way, why not?
maybe ii am just lousy at managing my life.

ii may have one of the best grades.
ii may have meet the best people in life.
ii may be blessed with all kinds of opportunities.
but when it comes to life, ii think ii really suck at it.

ii try so damn hard to conceal.
only to find myself breaking down time & again.

ii feel like digging a hole, hide my self inside, & never face the world again.

2010-03-20T10:58:00.007+08:00

ii have removed the blog post.
ii am letting it go, ii am moving on. dat's it.

true enough, ii felt really horrible this morning, maybe even now.
but probably, a lot better now.

ii came back, knowing what ii want.
to let go, & take you as a friend.
but it is really harder than ii thought it is.
when the truth hit right in my face, ii felt like running away.
back to the orphanage, when ii did not have to face all these shit.
boy, you know it, that feeling.

but for as long as you are happy,
ii respect your choice, respect you.
ii wish you all the best. be a happy guy. (:

And,
thank you for all the messages sent to me this morning, asking me if ii am fine, & alright. telling me everything is fine, & finding ways to cheer me up. it was pretty stunting how you people come onto this space so quickly. but yes, thanks! georgiana is thankful & grateful. :D

thank you for coming down east to find me this morning.
thank you for giving me the hug ii needed so ever much.
thank you for lending me your shoulder to cry on.
thank you for constantly giving me the attention, just so to check if ii am fine.
thank you for sending me home, when you know ii was running a fever.

ii am really thankful that you are here each & every time ii needed you.
thank you, till 44 movie stubs.

status: fever, 38.3degree celsius.

2010-03-06T23:45:00.003+08:00

hello!
EXAMS ARE OVERR! :D :D
HOLIDAYSS ARE HERE HERE HERE. :D

now, ii am five hours from my flight.
ii wont be sleeping, since ii got to start getting ready at 2plus.
ii shall sleep on the plane for that few hours. :D :D

this getaway was something ii wanted for a really long time.
always wanted to get out of this place for awhile.
probably to recover from all those wounds, & pain & stuff.

to think about what ii exactly want, and face things which ii ultimately have got to face. handle them, & resolve them.

or not, ii will never be able to move on.
ii will continue hurting people around me, & those who honestly cared.

this trip, ii will be away from civilization.
away from the stressful nation of ours, and to help. makes more people happy, and see more smiley faces. :D :D

when ii am back, ii will come out to be a stronger person. :D

*ii hope the eleven days that ii am away, you will be fine.
*ii hope the eleven days that ii am away, you will be surviving well.
*ii hope the eleven days that ii am away, you will miss me like ii do.
*ii hope the eleven days that ii am away, we know what we exactly want.
*ii hope the eleven days that ii am away, ii will recover from those wounds.
*ii hope the eleven days that ii am away, things change for the better.

**ii hope the eleven days later, ii will come back being a happier person.

NOW, till tweleve days later.. .~

2010-03-01T23:43:00.003+08:00

MCQ MCQ MCQ MCQ MCQ MCQ MCQ MCQ MCQ MCQ MCQ MCQ MCQ
seriously, what is wrong with MCQs?
why do ii always & forever screw them up?

ii feel like a joke.
getting full marks for essay questions & failing MCQs.
seriously, W.H.A.T. T.H.E. F.U.C.K?

it didnt happen once or twice.
but ALWAYS happen. arghsss.
CAN I PROPOSE TO REMOVE MCQ FROM EXAMS?
WILL ANYONE KILL ME? ok, ii think everyone will.

ok, nvm.
ii shall be less harsh and mean.
accumulate good karma, and ii may get a better chance of hitting the 25% right?

ok, this will be what ii will do totally do. LOL.
at least until end of exams. (: (: (:

ok, enough of my blabbering nonsense.
for now, goodnights. be back tmr. :D :D
5days to flying- ..

2010-02-27T00:42:00.003+08:00

hello! ii am back, but exams arent over. BOO!
ii think ii am getting better, happier in a wayy. :D :D
probably are the busy stuff keeping me exhausted to think of anything.

been feeling super unwell lately.
ii havent been eating a proper meal, until todayy. :D :D

a few updates. :D

my new phone: xperia x2.
a pity the price ii paid for doesn't match up to my expectations.

2papers downn downn downn. 2more to gogogo.
fmrp & cf down. blaw & ta next. :D :D
afterwhich, ii can party, ii can play, ii can watch movies. :D

another 1week to flying off.
ii am getting a lil' anxious, ii am getting scared.
but ii am going there to help. leaving civilization & getting over the past. recover & make more people happy. and getting myself prepared for the next phase. a happy one. :D

2010-02-19T15:39:00.003+08:00

ii realise what become of blogger when ii stay at home.
ii blog non-stop.

aiyaa, ii got no inspiration on how to draft my essay la.
ii cant think of a strong introduction.
ii cant draft a grade A essay.
so ii am not doing it until ii got my thoughts formulated.
so ii am not doing it until ii deem ii didnt have a choice.

peektures. :D
ii took them over webcam a few days back in my room. ii love my room! :D :D

meeting the guys over mj later!
kill time kill time. ii hope they are willing to catch a midnight movie with me now. please watch the 12.20am percy jackson & the lightning thief with me, please?

till 3am when ii am home (if ii get to watch movie). (:
ii think ii will get to watch, ~~because moumouren will give in to me. (: (:~~

2010-02-19T13:54:00.004+08:00

you know ii know that.
ii know that right from the start, ii was never wrong.
my predictions & my conjectures were correct.
you shouldnt have reassured me they were wrong, because ii fucking know ii am correct.

so now, because ii believed those "reassurances",
ii got to be bloody hurt, by acts of your irresponsibility.

you are just another crapp piece of shit that got what you wanted, & in the process, sacrifice friendships, love & relationships, & left. you materialistic fool.

this is the final straw. this is the final straw.
dont blame me for whatever that ii will do now, because you fucking caused it.

but yes, probably everyone was right.
yes, ii'd rather hurt than to feel nothing at all~

2010-02-19T00:25:00.004+08:00

hello earthlings. :D :D
hope chinese new year has been great for y'all so far. (: (:

tonight ii am back on this space, recapping what ii have done.
chinese new year has been great; ii mahjong all day & night. :D :D
ii didnt snack a lot, & ii thought mahjong caused me to lose weight. HAH.

some random day.
clique had reunion lunch together over seoulgarden.
it was funny, but it sure was fun. (:
someway or another to keep the friendship & bond going. (:

random shots & neoprint. (: (:

CNYeve.
eve was spent having reunion dinner over at grandma's.

chinatownn with darling-l & jw in the night time.
my first first first time dere on the eve. interesting.
but my first & shall be my last too! the crowd is horrible. –_-"

rooftop @thecentral to countdown for valentine's & CNY. (: (:
ii caught the pretty fireworks. ii love the night breeze. (:
ii love the peace. ii enjoy that space. ii love the scenery. (:

clarke quay & random shots.

C-for-Clinic after which. :D :D
georgiana loves drinking! weee~

jw’s long island (:

darling-l’s mojito blah blah blah. (:

& mine. (: (:

shots.

before cabbing home with darling girl at ii-dont-rmb-what-time. –.-"

above are the 16 out of 68 pictures we took. LOL. pictures NOT available in fb.
aiite, enough for tonight. got tiredd. will be back on this space to update the next 3days again.

TWTessay writing tomorrow. BOO!
"Imposing restrictions on freedom of speech by the Government is justifiable. Discuss."

ohyes, one more thing.
thank you for the roses. (:

goodnights!

2010-02-16T01:44:00.002+08:00

blog song updated.

Picture perfect memories,
Scattered all around the floor.
Reaching for the phone cause, I can't fight it any more.
And I wonder if I ever cross your mind.
For me it happens all the time.

It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now.
Said I wouldn't call but I lost all control and I need you now.
And I don't know how I can do without, I just need you now.

Another shot of whiskey, can't stop looking at the door.
Wishing you'd come sweeping in the way you did before.
And I wonder if I ever cross your mind.
For me it happens all the time.

It's a quarter after one, I'm a little drunk,
And I need you now.
Said I wouldn't call but I lost all control and I need you now.
And I don't know how I can do without, I just need you now.

Yes I'd rather hurt than feel nothing at all.
It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now.
And I said I wouldn't call but I'm a little drunk and I need you now.
And I don't know how I can do without, I just need you now.
I just need you now.

Oh baby I need you now.

- Need You Now, Lady Antebellum

no valentine day post. no valentine day date.
it was a day to be spent with someone special & dear & close @heart.
ii held on to a hopeless glimpse of hope.
ii pushed away every date.
ii must have been disappointing.
ii am clearly a loser. FML.

2010-02-13T02:16:00.004+08:00

mad loves.

2010-02-13T02:07:00.004+08:00

dear god,
ii have sinned.

ii know ii have been real bitchy at times, immature & childish.
sometimes, arrogant & mean.
demoralizing people around me, esp. donnie, for ii dont know why.

ii know ii haven't been behaving.
ii know ii haven't been studying hard.
ii know ii have been skipping school.

but please hear me out:
PLEASE SAVE GEORGIANA & HER GRADES!!

dear god,
have you heard my prayers tonight?

2010-02-10T19:39:00.004+08:00

hello!
ALL PROJECTS CLEARED! wee~

And bloody hell?
ii was looking at my credit card spending + bank a/c etc.
ii spend $1400plus is holyy 3 weeks.
WHAT THE FUCK. (and to think ii am ordering another 3dresses online now)
ii am breaking personal records time & again. crapp.

And what's worst is, ii will be away for 2weeks this march holidays.
ii will be away during ITshow. --> NO QUICK MONEY.
ii need more more jobs please!

Bought my new phone on sundayyy!
loves it, minus the random windows issue.
ohyes, it's Xperia X2.
pictures will be up soon, as soon as ii get my pink camera back from "pink helmet" boy.
(:

Has reunion dinner over lunch with clique yesterday & it was mad awesome.
pictures are up on facebook, and will be on this space soon (ii hope).

Did my haircut with kason @twister earlier this afternoon.
mad love my fringe! (: (:
it's short short short, but it isnt bangs. (:

now, ii need to think of how to earn more moolahs.
now, ii need to find the discipline to mug for UCCdpaper on friday.

mainicure/pedicure session with beloved mummy on friday night!
facial session with beloved mummy on saturday!
ii love mummy/daughter sessions together! :D :D

2010-02-07T12:37:00.005+08:00

hello.

2things:
1. ii shall not reply tags that has an indecent standard of english from outsiders/strangers.

2. ii shall not reply tags that has got to make me lower my standard & perspective to understand your so-called "english language".

let's analyze & see if ii am able to help someone amend his language.

indecent sub-standard english (1):
"Get a life *****. Stop harrasing pple. U have yur life. live it yur way. dun be such a ***** that is so busybody to comment on how pple live their lives. GET IT INTO YUR BRAIN DUMBASS."

errors (1):
spelling mistakes:
"harrasing" should be spelled as "harassing"
"yur" should be spelled as "your"

this sentence has serious language structuring issues:
"dun be such a ***** that is so busybody to comment on how pple live their lives."

indecent sub-standard english (2):
"THE POST IS WRITTEN BY BRIAN AKA SIAO KIA."
the person who blogs write a POST. you do not have access to my password, how did you write a POST? -_-"

when you posted a tag on my tag board, it is called a TAG, not a POST.
get your facts clear first. opps. ii think it is more of not knowing how to differentiate between both TAG and POST.

stop making yourself a laughing stock. complete joke.
as such, unless you are my friend, or ii look upon you as a friend, all other tags ii deem nonsensical would be removed.

back to law report now. due tomorrow.
thank you baby-s lawyer daddy who is willing to check the law report for us. (: (:

2010-02-06T17:54:00.003+08:00

hello.
ii hope you love the birthday gift. one thing down from your wishlist now.
it is time to get the LVwallet replaced after 3years of wear & tear. :D :D

ok. ii blogged 2 posts in office. 1 at home. LOL.

5 dresses, & 1 skirt to alter.
pretty people need nice clothes.

need to shop for 2 more pairs of heels. adding to a total of 35 pairs of heels in collection.
small people need high heels (:

goodbye crystal baby. you just turned 4months old.
ii think ii am getting xperia x2.
$100plus more expensive than isnt too significant.
intelligent people need a smart phone. *winks* LOL.

damn lame. fine. ii am quitting the game.
expressed my opinions, and defended my stand. (: (:

2010-02-06T12:15:00.003+08:00

TO THE MOST IMPORTANT MAN OF MY LIFE,
HAPPY (belated) BIRTHDAY!

ii have been so busy that ii actually forgotten it's your b'day!
but still. thank you. because without you, there wont be the me today.

you are always here, and a call away.
you are my knight in shining armor.

you did all my primary school homework for me.
you did all my art pieces in secondary school.
you send me to college everyday when ii was back at temasek jc.
you send me to campus (now) each day ii have morning lessons.
you are just a call away, when ii needed to get home quick to rest.

you were aware ii skipped lessons, since long ago.
you never scolded me for skipping lessons.

you were proud of me when ii got solid 6points for Olevels.
you constantly reassure me of my intelligence.
you always say "as long as ii have tried my best" each & every time ii didnt do well.

you never scolded me;
when one fine day, ii return home saying ii want to quit college
you never objected. you asked about my next step.
you gave me the confident that ii am not making the wrong choice.

when ii was awarded scholarships in poly
you were clearly happy that ii am doing well.
ii love the way you didnt have to worry about me, & the way you never asked about my results, assuming that it's full A's.

you always asked if ii have enough to spend
especially since one year back that ii stop taking allowance.

you always give priority to me when deciding where & what to eat.
ii always get to eat what ii want.

when ii said ii wanted a new camera (T90)
you bought it for me the next day.

ii always get what ii want. you never ever trash my confidence.

you never put me down.

ii am glad ii have an awesome dad, & a family that brought love & warmth into my life.

ii love you, dad.
thank you.

2010-02-06T10:40:00.003+08:00

hello people!

read my tagboard! ohmygod. it's amazing.
previous post has absolutely nothing to do with anyone, as stated clearly & explicitly under disclaimer.

but well, let me clarify it once again. the incident on the previous post has absolutely nothing to do with me at all. HAH! ii was randomly blog-hopping on the internet, & came across posts that kept me thinking, & when ii think ii felt an urge to write, so that's how it pops out.

but apparently, people who read that post are somewhat infuriated by my post.
ok, only one people. at least one who has over-reacted, & acted in his/her defence.

so dude,
here's what you can do, continue reading and piss your life off, or hit the close button. (:
ii am living in a democractic nation where freedom of speech exist.
ii am not living in uncle kim's nation (should you not know where it is, it's North Korea).

further to what ii have said, ii was not referring to anyone. it was ENTIRELY MY PERSONAL OPINION & ANALYSIS, WHICH YOU CAN, OR NOT AGREE ON.

should any similar incident occuring under your name, or ip address,
a police report will be lodged.
ii will be able to sue you under defamation act (chapter 75).

thank you. :D :D

2010-02-04T00:34:00.008+08:00

*edited*
hello earthling.
this post was meant to be something like OpsCambodia bonding session.
Or dinner @PanPacific, or loving my girlfriends & tooth fairy.
Or supper & gathering. Or my pink helmet.

But well, ii so came across a few blog posts, which makes me think quite a bit.
And ii need to type type type. so yes, here it is.

ii never understood honestly how stupid people can get. really.

stating a scenario, say a stranger said "ii saw your mum with another man", will you, or will you not believe him/her? if you do, den you are stupid. retardedly stupid. den now, it doesn't matter if you are a scholar, or a full A's, because it clearly shows your inability to think critically, nor your ability to analyze.

and you probably don't know how filthy this world is. oblivious.
because on earth, people back stab one another for his/her own benefit, or so, to put the other party in a detrimental situation/position.

back to the scenario.
say this stranger never like your mum all along, or maybe had a fight w/ her.
one fine day, he came across your facebook. probably added you on facebook, & you clearly will accept all your friend requests. know your blog. followed closely with your updates on blog & facebook. read the past post, & knew all that was happening. added you on msn, because your fucking email can be found in either your facebook or blog (like, DUH!). crafted a story. saying he saw your mum out behaving intimately with another guy. you believed him. you quarrelled w/ mum, & defamed her on your blog. everyone reads about it, honestly think it's your mummy wrong. But NO, probably mum's really innocent.

because it was a story. ii have learnt how to craft perfect stories in primary school. it was amazingly easy. to play mind games, just so to affect people psychologically. and so, ii never completely believe in stories. ii take them into consideration. :D :D ii am glad ii felt smarter than someone ~~today~~, not just today, but totally.

so, please tell me:
WHY ARE PEOPLE SOMETIMES SO AMAZING STUPID?!
havent mum teaches you how not to believe the words of strangers?
when ii am a kid, my mum does that all day long, constantly reminding me not to open doors to strangers & stuff. HAH.

disclaimer:
no name are mentioned; ii am not pin-pointing at any particular person. everything above shall be completely my personal opinion, my analysis, which you can or not be agreed on.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

ok that aside.
ii have a broken nail, just one week before manicure. nice.
nail extension. looks like ii didn't have a choice.

ii felt dumb getting a 'M' size skirt online, honestly.
it's so loose now, no wait, ii cant even hold it at my hip.

ii have been doing too much shopping.
500bucks in 2 weeks is so not funny.
5 new dresses. 1 skirt. 5 tops. shorts. heels. make-up.
FML.

ii am gonna bid goodbye to 4months old LG crystal.
getting a SE Satio or Xperia X2. WHICH?

ii shall remove those french nails now & sleep.
shall not think too much about what has happened today.

ii have a nightmare last night.
ii was shot in my chest, and now ii am glad ii woke up still alive.
super L-O-L.

goodnights earthlings.

2010-01-31T14:48:00.003+08:00

hello this space. (:
ii havent been to blogger for so damn blooody long.
been really really busyy & ii think it's a good distraction & divertion. (:

for the past 9 days that ii have been missing, ii have been busy with:
1. UCCD report plus presentation - cleared on monday (:
2. FMRP paper - cleared on wednesday (:
3. Technical Analysis - cleared on friday (:
4. Vacinnations at TanTockSeng - cleared on thursday
5. OpsCambodia GrpBonding
6. Suppers & Gatherings
7. Mugging & Shopping
8. MA2 proj [status: still working on it]

been really busyy. havent been taking pictures. am losing interest.
screwing up too much papers. skipping morning classes for 3weeks already.
worrying over not getting A's. being an insignificant lil' creature. not working.
spending way too much, & running out of budget.

look at how really pathetically my life is screwing me up.
in short, ii am busy screwing my life, such that ii get screwed up. FML.

2010-01-22T04:33:00.004+08:00

HAPPY 22nd BIRTHDAY! :D :D

hello sleeping people. (: (:
it's 4.33am now, and ii just got bored & hell distracted.
UCCDreport is close to completion already (~80%)! :D :D
*happy*

ii ran out of things to do, no one to talk to. damn scary when everywhere is so fcuking quiet. ):
bloody hell, those online one all doing projects also. –_-"

so yes, being boredd & all,
ii came to this space, & have my promise delivered! :D

super love this picture, super love my pink camera! :D :D
ii am so gonna get SATIO (another 12.1 mp camera phone) & Ipod Touch! :D :D

now, back to report. ii am left with cheese's part. + miscellaneous.
ii shall aim to finish by 6a.m! :D :D wee! still damn hyper. :D :D
whoever who see this, please wake me up at 10.45a.m later!
xie xie ni !^_^

2010-01-20T18:40:00.003+08:00

hello! hello! hello!
ii think ii slept enough today, so ii am quite hyper now!
haha!

this space really havent been having peektures.
next post, promise. (:

you know, ii so love myself today!
ii love my procrastinations!
ii always do projects last minute (like today, when it is due on friday) :D
ii so love the way ideas only flow in on 2days before submission.
ii so love my brain for only consolidating all the research 2days before submission.
it's amazing. makes me excited & happy!~
[but cfm cannot finish by tomorrow night one, clique gonnna suffer again~]

HAH! ii love busy moments!
it keeps me from thinking of emo thoughts (like SUICIDE?) -_-"
will be so so busy over the next few weeks!
CAs. presentations. projects. projects. presentations. CAs. [And full A's]. :D

now ii will start on my page 6 out of 15 of my report.
ii love myself today~

2010-01-17T16:55:00.003+08:00

hello!
ii am so sorry this space is filled with unahppy stuff & emo stuff.
ii predict it will still go on for awhile. bear with me.
ii will be fine fine soon
den ii can buy stickers with smiley faces only, ook? promise. (:

blood blood blood test report is out.
and bloody hell, 5 jabs 5 jabs 5 jabs.
ii called in to ask for my results, & it's like so horrible lo!
the doctor totally say ii got NO antibody at all, not insufficient, is DONT HAVE. -.-
NO antibody = NO immune system. so ii will fall sick very very easily.
(count myself lucky that ii am not exposed to virus & bacteria) -_-"

you cant imagine the sick me right!
ii also cant imagine me whining all day also. HAH! (actually, mayb ii can)

so back to 5jabs. will be taking it as TanTockSengHospital SOON.
well, actually the 5 packets of m&m's for the 5jabs taken still not motivating can?
ii take 5 jabs in exchange for 5 pacs of m&m's. -.-

gastrics issue have been working out worst than before lately.
ii am quite used to the pain already actually. but well, still suck.

And for you, please tell me the truth. ii am prepared, ii think it cant get more painful since it's already that painful now. ii wish ii could vanish into thin air.
never felt this depressed in my 19years of life before.
ii think ii am losing my sanity, & all other motivations. ii am losing myself.

2010-01-17T11:47:00.003+08:00

43 things a girl wish her boyfriend knew:
(if you love me, you should totally read this! ii have coloured those impt ones! HAH!)

#1 When you break her heart, the pain never really goes away.

#2 When she misses you, she's hurting inside.

#3 When she says it's over, she still wants you to be hers.

#4 When she walks away from you mad, follow her.

#5 When she stares at your mouth, kiss her.

#6 When she pushes or hits you, grab her tight & don't let her go.

#7 When she starts cursing at you, kiss her and tell her you love her.

#8 When she ignores you, give her your attention.

#9 When she pulls away, pull her back.

#10 When you see her at her worst, tell her she's beautiful. LOL!

#11 When you see her crying, just hold her and don't say a word.

#12 When you see her walking, sneak up and hug her waist from behind.

#13 When she's scared, protect her.

#14 When she lays her head on your shoulder, tilt her head up and kiss her.

#15 When she steals your favourite jacket, let her keep it and sleep with it for a night.

#16 When she teases you, tease her back and make her laugh.

#17 When she doesn't answer for a long time, reassure her that everything is okay.

#18 When she looks at you with doubt, back yourself up with the truth.

#19 When she says that she likes you, she really does more than you could understand.

#20 When she grabs your hands, hold hers and play with her fingers.

#21 When she bumps into you, bump into her back and make her laugh.

#22 When she tells you a secret, keep it safe and untold.

#23 When she looks at you in your eyes, don’t look away until she does.

#24 Stay on the phone with her even if she’s not saying anything.

#25 Don't let her have the last word.

#26 Don't call her hot, but gorgeous or beautiful is so much better.

#27 Say you love her more than she could ever love you.

#28 Argue that she is the best girl ever.

#29 When she's mad, hug her tight and don't let go.

#30 When she says she's OK, don’t believe it, talk to her about it, because 10 yrs later she'll still remember it.

#31 Call her at 12:00am on special occasions to tell her you love her.

#32 Call her before you sleep and after you wake up.

#33 Treat her like she's all that matters to you.

#34 Don't ignore her when she's out with you and your friends.

#35 Stay up all night with her when she's sick.

#36 Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid.

#37 Let her into your world.

#38 Let her wear your clothes.

#39 When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.

#40 Let her know she's important.

#41 Kiss her in the pouring rain.

#42 When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is; "Who's ass am I kicking today baby?"

#43 After she reads this, she hopes one day you'd read it too.

extracted from & credit to:
http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#/pages/43-things-a-GIRL-wished-her-BOYFRIEND-knew-/219996178577?v=info&ref=nf