ii am still figuring out how to get you out of my heart & head.
fact remains, you are still the first to enter & last to leave.

and ii am still horribly upset.
just that it can temporarily be taken away some times.
extreme mood fluctuations really isn't doing me any good.
take me away take me away take me away!

as a guy ,
you dont go pick a girl up, & go out cruising alone w/ her ;
you dont travel west to east, & ended up by a beach gazing at the stars w/ her ;
you dont spend almost every night w/ her ;
you dont do things that couples do w/ her ,

when you have a girlfriend.

what does this go to show exactly?
that you dont fucking care; or this girl is so fucking un-important?;
or you cant live a moment without a girl?;
or this is the kinda freedom you deserved?

it's a mental note ii am making to myself now.
ii am hitting the bed now, after being awake for soon-to-be 30hours.. .

goodnights people!

MERRY CHRISTMAS PEOPLE!

alcohol, either bring a person to her highest high or lowest low.
brought me to my lowest low.

it is the one time ii got myself so drunk. crapp.
hangover is so efff-ing bad now.
ii am trying to put together what happened last night now.
cant seem to remember a lot. LOL.
but thank you zk & ghost. (:

so so so many christmas greetings. ii like ii like. (: (:
ii will be back to this space again, soon. (:

the last night. and the last few minutes of the night.
ii look at the windows in my room & through it, at that inclined slope of grass;
& thought for the one final time. just one last time.

tonight has ended.
tomorrow, a new phase of life flip open & it will be a new beginning.

on a side note,
thank you all.
people who text-ed me, msn-ed me, called me & fb-ed me to ask if ii am fine.
and people who really accompanied me day & night, without fail. & the many running conversations. & the dates w/ boys & girls. (:
thank you. love y'all. (: (:

-221209-
completed work.
yes, it is totally the same as the one in the room; just that it's another piece.

is praying that today never ends & tomorrow never comes.

love walking in the rain. :D :D
caught avatar 3d today, & somehow ii hope it is even more magical than it is already.

will reply the tagboard, when ii think ii am in a better position to do so. :D
sorry!

this is bad this is bad this is bad.
ii couldnt get to sleep last night, & my eyes are puffy today! ): ):

ii climb onto bed at 3plus last night, despite not feeling tiredd at all.
couldnt sleep. couldnt sleep. counted meh meh also cant sleep. -.-

den when ii soon fall asleep, ii got a bloody nightmare, damn fucking real.
ii woke up crying; like tears rolling out of my eyes y'know!!
And until now, the whole nightmare still damn vivid, like it really happened.
it was like whatt, only 5a.m when ii got up?! den ii wanted to call someone/text someone, but who on earth still fucking awake at that time?! ii dont like sms that has no reply. makes me sad. ): ):

难道日有所思, 夜有所梦? hais.

tossed around the bed. 7a.m still not asleep.
seriously felt damn scare from the already damn timid me.
only fall alseep when the room was brighter; & before ii knew it, ii got to wake up for work already! BOO!

so now, my eyes are puffy, without double eye-lid.. . suck.
And ii am thinking of shutting down this space, because ii have resumed diary writing lately. shall see how. gonna buy a scrapbook later! *happy* :D :D